Sweet child of mine,
This is your mummy speaking, put your listening ears on and come sit with me. Yes, you can have a sticker on your reward chart for listening well. A rainbow one, a sunshine, a smiley face, the moon on the stick if your heart so desires.
The first thing we need to talk about is your eye test at Kindergarten tomorrow. Everyone is going to have their eyes looked at, you and all of your friends. You’re right it will be fun, that’s the spirit, like a game. And your eyes are strong it will be easy! Why are you sad? Strong eyes are good, really good. Hmmm, it is tricky but that’s just the way we are made, it’s genetics, we all have strong eyes. Strong eyes don’t need glasses. I’m not sure there are any exceptions. It isn’t fair is it? Yes, like Charlie and Lola, Lola didn’t need glasses either but made those funky cardboard ones. We can do this; pink, purple, and red with flowers and swirls, that’s not a problem. Is that a good compromise, different home-made glasses every day of the week? Well no-one can really see in the dark, glasses won’t help with that either.
I’m a little reluctant to broach the next subject with you, so here goes. Boots, you need some new winter boots…. They may not be exactly the same as your old pair. Well the thing is your feet have grown so they don’t fit anymore. I’m happy for you to try but given no other shoes from last winter fit I’d be surprised. I do like surprises you’re right! On the off-chance they don’t fit we’ll go to the shoe-shop later and see what they have in your size. I’m not sure that will be the best time to play the ‘who’s in charge’ game. I am in charge more than you, I know, but given you are only four your turn will come. It’s not really about taking it in turns, that’s more in relation to playing nice with your brother, not in the making of grown-up decisions. Again life is not always fair my lovely but we will choose some great new boots together.
That’s probably enough serious chat for today, you did great listening! Come and choose a sticker, ok two stickers, why not?
I love our little chats, I love coming and sitting with you, you stroking my hair and I get to smell your perfume. If I remember I need to borrow some of that, it can go in my box behind the cushion on my chair. I love being able to hide things which you know nothing about!
There seems to be some confusion though. I sit and patiently listen to you but you are not listening to me. You talk about compromise and I am all for that, my compromise would be getting a pair of glasses and leaving the boots.
And a sticker for listening mum, really? I love stickers, in the same way you love chocolates I think and I don’t see you just having one or two of those. Life isn’t fair is it, one set of rules for you and another for me.
Back to this glasses thing. I really do need glasses. Alice’s mum says if you eat carrots it helps you see in the dark. We both know I won’t eat these, I know you try to trick me by grating them in my dinner, but they’re orange! Do you really expect me not to notice. So you see I do need glasses, how’s that for pro-choice.
Genetics you say, just the way we’re made. So these genetics you speak of seem to have dealt me the curly hair card. How everyone goes on and on about my beautiful curls. If these were all that, how is it that you straighten your hair and Dad cuts his so short? So a little less of your genetic chat please, sweet mother of mine.
And finally my winter boots. Last year’s were the best, we both know it doesn’t get better than that. You champion healthy competition, so much so that you chose to stencil something to that effect on my wall – growing wings and flying or something, oh how Dad and I laughed. Not at your expense, please don’t think that, more at the thought putting something like that on my wall at the tender age of two would somehow spur me on to a life full of achievements. I realise I digress slightly, the point being last year’s boots were perfect. Nothing that sweet smiling shoe-shop lady can find in my size this year will compete. And she’s not all that sweet Mama, she, as I recall, forced my wide-fitting feet into some narrow fitting shoes in the Spring. I may have stopped having tantrums but I assure you I will play a blinder if lured under false pretences into the shoe shop. I am very much in charge here, after all I have learnt from the best.
That’s all for now Mum, let’s see how today plays out. Thanks for my stickers.